apathy bleeds when its

directed at me when needs are

cut short like my breath when

I am near the thought of being

without this construct of a person

the reality has shattered

leaving pieces but no peace of

mind or leasing out the space

I had reserved upstairs for dreaming

of a future where you walked through

my door and gave me reason to

live on when I had seasons to

prepare a path for walking simply

stalking through my memories

like an exotic predator a creep for

sure but now its assured that your

far flung and never to return

and I’m left here to burn

the memories you reserved

in places deep inside my inky

cavernous callow heart

where no false starts where brought

to bear upon your

ecstatic trepidation your

erotic fascination with

the elderly gentlemen you court

and I’m now alone of course

where your exceedingly ignoring me

and making me think I am one

to be disgusted with when all I

ever wanted was a reason

to keep dreaming

and perhaps a place to stop

my seething nightmarish fantasies

where nothing is just what it seems

but you are here and I’m

no longer me


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